Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Takde Planning Langsung-la...

Many of us have been in a situation whereby we tell person A that we are hanging out with person B when in fact we are out partying with person C. And of course the smart ones will tell person B about this "cover up" storyline. You know, just in case person A calls and asks for us and person B can cook up a " I think she went to the loo" or "damn, I just walked away from her for a while, can she call you back?".

We all anticipate this verification of the story line and hence that is why we always, ALWAYS inform person B of it. We dont leave Person B in the dark and expose her to a call from person A asking where we are and her going "HUH?"

Why am I rambling on about something which has obviously confused all of you with so many persons and so many alphabets?

BALKIS.(Association of Wives of State Assemblymen and Members of Parliament in Selangor- I know. Like WTF? They have an association for THIS? Apparently they do.)

You see, the Wife of Former Menteri Besar of Selangor, one Datin Seri Zaharah Kechik transferred RM9.9 million (of Balkis's money) to another association Bakti (Federal Organisation of Wives of Ministers- repeat exclamation of incredulousness above) three days after Selangor fell to the Opposition in the general election. And then the previous committee tries to dissolve the assocation and set up a new body- Balkis-BN (fuyoo!Like ULTRAMAN-GABAN)

So obviously many people are of the thinking that this MUST be illegal. After all, how can you transfer money as and when you like it?

So Wife of Former Menteri Besar of Selangor Datin Zaharah said that following the dissolution of the Association(which she says she had power to do), the RM9.9m were transferred to Bakti according to Article 15(2) of the Balkis Constitution (wahlau DAMN impressive, she actually read up the Balkis Constitution)and that if we the rakyat doubt her, she can prove that the auditors have been consulted and everything was in order.

And today on the front page of the newspapers, the auditor says HAH? . We were not consulted (okay, crudeness was inserted by me- just for effects).

So you see, if I were Wife of Former Menteri Besar of Selangor, I would have at least told the auditors, "hey look. I told them you were consulted. So you say you were and I will share a little of the RM9.9m with you-la. We together-gether benefit ma.

But instead, the auditor was OBVIOUSLY left in the dark. Oblivious to everything that was going on. And only learning of the alleged( see, I am politically correct, I do not make wild allegations until its proven) illegal transfer of money was brought to light last Friday.

So Wife of Former Menteri Besar of Selangor, how now brown cow?

How to explain the transfer of money and the dissolution?

I already have my popcorn and coke ready for the sandiwara that is to come!

Monday, April 28, 2008

I am sorry you are such a jerk, I really am.

"I apologise if this has affected anybody. I apologise to the non-Malays if they felt afraid of the symbol.

"To the Malays, I also apologise because I cannot defend the symbol of our heritage."

-Umno Youth chief Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Hussein.

There are crap apologies, and then there is Hishamuddin stupid, can-you-BE-more-insincere apology.

What type of an apology is this?

I apologise to the non-Malays if they felt afraid of the symbol?

It is the type of apology which is classified under "I am sorry you are such a jerk." or "I am sorry I said what I said and made you cry because I should have known that you're a sensitive bitch" or perhaps even "Please accept my sincerest apologies for doing what I did. I am truly sorry you are too stupid to understand why I did it."

But before that, since WHEN is the keris a symbol of the Malay heritage or UMNO's struggle? Just because it is customary for UMNO to kiss it and raise it and whatever else they do to it before the UMNO meeting starts, does NOT make it a symbol of Malay heritage which requires "defending" (WTF does this even mean? Raising it and yelling like a mad cow constitutes defending it?)Okay, so maybe I might be wrong. But this really is the first time I hear of the need to "defend" it.

But anyway, moving along.

We are NOT afraid of your damn symbol ok? Did you hear that, let me repeat that, we are not NOT afraid of the symbol you hold so highly and revere.

In the first place, there is nothing to fear. It is a thing. An object. (Attaching sentiments to it does not automatically make it something to be feared- it is still an object,a lifeless object) The only thing we fear is the fact that you are our Education Minister and you waving a keris yelling BLOOD does not augur well for the Non-Malays in our already rapidly declining education system.

And just because you make your yearly rounds to Chinese or Tamil schools, smiling, cutting ribbons, and making generally nice comments about these schools, does not mean you do not, in the privacy of your own home (or in PWTC during UMNO assemblies) call for slaughter of Non-Malays(symbolically or otherwise).

We know better. And that is why we made it known to you, LOUD AND CLEAR in the general election that you can shove your keris up your you know where.

And of course, the question of why it took you so long to issue an apology (an insincere one at that) is a mystery. It is a mystery because as Education Minister, we thought you have more brains (of course, many a times, we are wrong to assume politicians have brains) and thought process to sit down and think the BEST time to apologise for the keris wielding exercise is probably right after it happened. Not a year and a half later, or after UMNO's dismal performance at the general election.

Understandbly,your reason for this delayed apology is because:-

"the issue was not as big as it was made out to be.

But the reality is such, and I am not someone who is so filled with pride or arrogance that I cannot accept this fact."

Pride and arrogance is ALL you have, our dear Education Minister.

Because if you had indeed been as humble and sincere as you want us to think you are, you would not even have to issue this insincere apology (for whatever it is worth).

Because you would have never done the wrong you have done in the first place.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Why I envy Penang (Just this ONE time)

"My objective is clear and it has remained consistent throughout my political career, which is to serve the people.

My decision is motivated by the fact that Penang's interest cannot be compromised by any politicial consideration."

- Datuk Lee Kah Choon on why he quit Gerakan after accepting the post of director in InvestPenang and Penang Development Corporation.

THIS is probably the only time I envy Penang.
(I mean, prior to this, I never envied their bad traffic, their bridge woes, their dirtied beaches and their bad drivers.)

But now, I envy that they have a man, who is above the rest. A man, who actually stands out and ABOVE all petty politicking. A man who truly believes he serves the interest of the state and the nation above his own. A man who made the bold decision to quit his party because "BN had never had the policy of working with an Opposition party".(BN supporters? Do you hear that? Its not about what is best for you as citizens. It is ALL about what is best for the party.)

Someone whom we can finally heave a sigh of relief because he actually exsists and wants to serve the country. And its not about which party he belongs to, and what party interests he has to serve, and its not all about TALKING about serving the people(subject to it being within party limits) but actually DOING it.

A true statesman indeed.

A round of applause for this great man.

So can this man live up to the heavy burden placed on his shoulders? Many doubt his abilities. Many yell that he has NO experience. And to this, I ask, did the ex Chief Minister have any experience prior to being elected to the Penang's Development Corporation? Not that I know of. Did Penangnites give him a chance? They sure did. Did the BN people shout obscenities of his inexperience? Not that I heard of.

Let us see whether he can perform in his new shoes. His heart and his head is in the right place. That already scores brownie points with me.

Penang, I envy you. Just this once.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Eh, you Malaysian meh?

By now, all of us know that one Mongolian woman by the name of Altantuya is dead. And she was allegedly killed by three Malaysians. And one of these three Malaysians allegedly did it at the behest of some top politician. The trial is still ongoing. (its going into its 107th day now I think)

And while many of us were excited to know the outcome initially, many of us really couldnt care less about it anymore. (yes, such is the mundane nature of a real non-tv related trial- no SURPRISE witnesses, no SURPRISE finger pointing no JENG JENG JENG moments where some surprise exhibit is tendered or a witness swooshes through the front door).

What irks me is the family of this murdered lady. First his father complains that the trial is taking very long. Like hello? Other people in MALAYSIA have to have their trial go on too you know? What your daughter is the only murder victim in the country?

And then he goes to the media and complains about how he finds it hard to "pick up the pieces emotionally and financially". And that Altantuya's children are missing her, one has an enlarged head from fluid retention, the other had to be tutored privately because he could not stand the jibes he got from school due to his mother's death (what jibes? that she is dead? that I suppose IS cruel). AND of course there is the disappointment with the Malaysia NGOs.

And I quote from the Sun :-
" Shariibuu said he was disappointed that the Malaysian non-government organisations (NGOs) had not spoken up or offered any assistance to the family, while the Malaysian media has been potraying Altantuya in a bad light."


"When it came to one prostitute in UK, the whole country and Umno was talking about helping her and sending assistance for her, but here we have two children who have lost their mother and nobody does anything."

Okay, uncle. Just FYI,

Firstly, your daughter (and yourself and your grandchildren) are NOT MALAYSIANS? HELLO? Just because she was allegedly killed IN malaysia does not automatically mean she is entitled to be OFFERED any help by the Malaysian Government (or NGOs). What do you think? That us Malaysians OWE you something? We work hard to earn our money. We pay our taxes and just because 3 men of Malaysian origin ALLEGEDLY killed her, we surrender our money to HELP YOU?

Call me selfish. Call me whatever you like. But I am NOT surrendering any help or agreeing to any help being given to you. Sorry. Many other people IN Malaysia, who ARE Malaysians need more help than you. Many Malaysians live below the poverty line, many are struggling everyday, and you, YOU who can travel all the way from Mongolia every time there is a trial, want us to help you financially?

And FYI, many Malaysians have gone overseas and committed crimes and have been caught there, and the Malaysian government has been consistent in its stance that we will not extend any help to them. If you dare commit the crime, then you must serve the time. Period.

What am I getting it? Well, I am just saying that many Malaysians are waiting and hoping for help by the Malaysian government, but they do not get it (whether they deserve it or not) and here you are, a Mongolian citizen, DEMANDING us to offer help and BERATING us for not helping you?

Come on. Dont make me slap you around and call you Shabu-Shabu.

And secondly, you have to be very clear that UMNO offered to help that Sufiah girl in the UK. Not the rakyat. They do NOT speak for us. And Malaysians have this tendency to tumpang glamour when we know of any famous/infamous person who has 1/800th of Malaysian blood. (OH GUY SEBASTIAN!He used to be taken care of by Malaysian god parents, MALAYSIAN! Oh Che'nelle!She stayed in Sabah for 9 years!MALAYSIAN!)

Anyway, I digress.

My point is, yes, Sufiah should not be offered ANY help. In the first place, she does NOT need help. Prostitution is a choice. (To me anyway, many people may disagree) So she might not have made the best choice, but she still made a choice which she is entitled to. And besides, what type of help are we talking about here? Brainwash? Offer her money so that she doesnt have to sell her body? Come on. She has the brains. She CAN make the money without selling her body. She just does not want to.
So let her be.

Oh wait, I digress again.

Okay, my REAL point is, Mr. Shaariibu, who are YOU to make judgment calls on Malaysia? We want to help Sufiah? So what? We do not want to help you? SO WHAT? We are entitled to! Its our damn money!

While we are sorry your daughter was murdered, allegedly by 3 Malaysians, we do NOT owe you anything.

So stop going to the media to try to gain sympathy. You do not have my sympathy. It really just makes me want to go over there and slap some senses into you.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Stop, Pause. Smell the Roses....

Every once in a while, you see a picture like this and feel blessed to know that despite our differences in religion and culture (perpetuated by mindless politicians and certain royalty) we are above all, Malaysians.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Iron Lady spews words of wisdom?

Today the headlines screamed this:-

RAFIDAH'S REMINDER...UMNO's Iron Lady Datuk Seri Rafidah Aziz says:-

"Remember, we are not changing the(Umno) President, we are changing the prime minister. Other parties can change their president tomorrow they can tell their president to go today, not Umno. We are talking about the prime minister and this country has never had a prime minister who has been pushed out in our history, always remember that."

I am SO thankful that we have Iron Lady (how is she an iron lady? Cos she spews nonsense out of her mouth with no consequences? Or that she managed to hold on to her position even with the AP fiasco?) to go to the Media and remind us of the obvious. Like, how lucky are we??
Some of us might have forgotten our beloved PM is actually the President of UMNO. Or that when we ask for beloved PM to step down, we are not just asking him to vacate the post of UMNO President but also as PM. So these sort of reminders are timely and appreciated.

To say Iron Lady is stating the obvious is an understatement. To say she is uttering nonsense is even more of an understatement.

Seriously Iron Lady, we the rakyat are not as stupid as you think we are. May we also send a few reminders to you.

No.1: History never had a PM whose wife died and he married his ex sister in law while still serving as PM;

No.2: History of Malaysia never had a PM who managed to singlehandedly incite more riots and street protests in his short tenure;

No.3: History of Malaysia never had a PM who listen and acts according to his son in law (but live in denial that he might actually be more stu- I mean, not as clever as he thinks he is)

But it still happened didnt it?

So, Iron Lady, YOU remember this:-

History cannot be changed (unless it involves Hang Tuah and his glorious life being taught in History classes until it was discovered he might be Chinese and swiftly removed from the History Books as being irrelevant to the History of Malaysia). However the Future can. We learn from History. We do not emulate the historical past. And we sure as hell do NOT, stick to what does not work in the past. We improve.

Just because it never happened before does not mean it can never happen.
(Please Iron Lady, go and read your World History. The Revolution? Ever heard of that? The Communist Party taking over China? Things change.)

Just because the PM happens to be the President of UMNO and you UMNO people do not remove your president as you like (cos you are all lalang and will pledge your support for whomever is in power just so your pockets remain full and your children remain well provided for) does not mean he should not be removed.

He is the PM first and foremost. If he fails in his duty while wearing that nametag, he should step down. And if that means he vacates his UMNO presidency, so be it.

UMNO does NOT rule us. UMNO is not the Government. We do not care what happens in UMNO.

We care about whether the PM is working or not. We care about whether he is fulfilling his promises. We care about ourselves. And are we being selfish? Yes. Do we have the right to be? YES. Its OUR country. Its OUR wellbeing. OUR money and our economy and OUR future at stake.

So Iron Lady, do not remind us of things irrelevant to the wellbeing of Malaysia but only relevant to you and your blind loyalty to your President.

Just dont.

And remember this too:-

UMNO(aka BN) screwed up.
Shit Happens.
Live with it.
Learn from it.
Move on.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

the Consti-what?

Remember the whole Terengganu MB fiasco?

Remember how our beloved PM chose candidate No.1 Mr. Jusoh, and how the Sultan of Terengganu(aka Agong) chose candidate No.2 Mr. Saad? And then all the UMNO members rallied behind their beloved UMNO president(because those people are "yes men" according to our beloved EX-PM and will bend like lalang whenever the wind blows) and cried that they will NOT support the Agong's choice but will stand behind Mr. Jusoh?

And did you know NONE of the mainstream media published all the wrongdoings of Mr. Jusoh? One Terengganu Newspaper detailed every single misappropriation of funds by Mr. Jusoh. From the Monsoon Cup to the Petronas subsidy. But mainstream media? None of that. All we get is, INFIGHTING BETWEEN PAS AND DAP. BN GETS SUPPORT BY RAKYAT. WE HEART PAK LAH. WE HEART BN.

Um, sorry. But some of us, do not HEART Pak Lah nor BN.

So they yelled and they scremed that it was not right for the Agong to interfere. They protested, they demonstrated. And what did the PM say of this bad behaviour and disrespect to the Agong? Nothing. But when Lim Kit Siang made a comment on his blog about his displeasure with the Sultan of Perak's decision to accept a PAS man as the MB of Perak, he was called disrespectful to the Sultan and asked to apologise.

To add insult to the injury, our beloved PM then looked the TV crew in the eyes(and straight into the cameara thrusted in his face) and said "ia tidak mengikut Perlembagaan Malaysia" ?

I nearly died laughing.


When did this country EVER respected the Perlembagaan? I do not remember the PM citing the Perlembagaan when he ordered the people to be arrested under the ISA just because they took to the streets to yell that they want RM1 million compensation each(albeit a stupid request but apparently it was for a much bigger cause), or sprayed water cannons and tear gas into the Bersih rally (freedom of expression?), or disallowed the inter religious conference,or kept mum when there was a discussion about whether one can convert out of Islam, or when some idiot of a Minister yelled Malaysia was a ISLAMIC country and that if the rest of us were unhappy, we could leave or somehow spared the water cannons when his son in law and his posse marched in front of the KLCC Convention Centre to give a memo to Condoleeza Rice (who CARES for what?) and also spared the UMNO(and BN) supporters the rough treatment of dispersing the crowd when they gathered in front of Komtar?
Equality before the law? CONSTITUTION?

Where is the "TIDAK MENGIKUT PERLEMBAGAAN" comment that was much needed and desired from the PM?

We didnt get jackshit.

Instead we heard crickets. That or a deafening silence.

However, when you challenge his choice of candidate for an all important post right after he suffered a humiliating loss (loss to Non-BN supporters but still a STRONG SUPPORT win if you are pro BN) and have been asked to step down as UMNO president and as PM, suddenly there is talk of this all elusive Perlembagaan.

Its one of those things we have HEARD about it but never really knew whether it actually, truly, exists. Now, we know, it MIGHT exists. Because the PM actually mentioned it.

However, the PM soon suffered a memory loss and forgot all about the fact that he said it was unconstitutional. He comes before the rakyat and declares(semacam hero)that he RESPECTS the decision of the Agong, and that he will support whichever candidate that will be sworn in a MB and so all his posse quickly rallied behind him and started kissing Mr. Saad's hand. Oh, we will serve you. WE HEART SAAD!

It really sends shivers down my spine to know that this MAN, this MAN who claims to represent us, the one whom we think should know the law and the workings of the country at the back of his hand, might actually be, an empty husk.

And merely a puppet.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Waiting for the Politicians to grow up

Another DAP man quits. Then changes his mind. SIX hours later.
This is not a "I think I should eat that cake. No I shouldnt. No I should. NO I should. No wait, I will" scenario ok?

This is Politics. This is you, representing those who have VOTED for you, to speak on their behalf. This is you being responsible not only for you own wellbeing, but for many others. This is you being a representative. A YB. This is you, at least trying not be an idiot of a person you truly are.

So, what made him quit and change his mind 6 hours later?

He says he was unhappy with the fact that there is only ONE indian man on the Perak exco.(or was it there was None? I forget) Apparently this does not represent the many indians in Perak. He wanted MORE representation. So, because he didnt get what he wanted, he whined and pouted and quit.(If only Samy Vellu was a quitter we wouldnt have had to endure him for this many years but fret not because luck is finally on our side this year!)
If DAP-PKR-PAS were not dependent on the two seat majority to retain their power in Perak, I would say thank you very much you lousy candidate/respresentative, be gone and dont come back!

Come on, first Fong Po Kuan and now this??

Don't ANY of you actually know anything about being matured about something? About discussion? About negotiation? That you actually sit to think, hmm...why is there only one Indian man on the exco?(Or none, as mentioned above, I forget) Is it because there is a lack of Indians in the party? Is it because the Indian majority is smaller? Is there an oversight? Maybe I should speak to Lim Guan Eng.


What are you?6 years old??

Women are not well represented in the Exco, did the women MPs quit??
(On this point, I would like to point out to a certain article in Star which said that women were not well represented in Parliament and this article mentions that Rafidah Aziz being UMNO Wanita Prez should have been given a spot in cabinet, I say "PLEASE LADY!Do you NOT know what Rafidah has been doing???What has she done for women anyway???I am SO glad she is gone. Even with the AP issue, she still lingered around courtesy of our dear PM- at least he has smartened up a bit)

Did the women yell, shove and pout and tender their resignation?(Fong Po Kuan is a different story la cos she doesnt represent women. She represents herself and her interest only. Oh I quarreled with some people in DAP. I want to quit. I wont change my mind, I will stick to my decision..I will..OOOHHH...ok, I changed my mind. LALANG!)

Ok, I digress.

You know what I think? I think politicians should just grow up. (No, its not a joke. I know many of you will laugh at the obviousness of this statement but I HAD to say it)Do not put yourself out to represent us when you are a man who cannot be rational.Someone who cannot even think of the Party as a whole and not only for himself. Someone who disrespects his leader. You say you can represent your people?
Please. Spare me the I AM STANDING UP FOR INDIANS. (Samy Velu also asked for Hindraf people to be release what...you think we believe everything Politicians say??)

I wish they would just grow up.